Tantalizing Tumblr Nuggets That Are Deep Fried In Humor

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mattstaff
Aug 1, 2021 8:00 PM EDT

The wonderful and wandering minds of Tumblr provide a ceaseless stream of funny and outright bizarre observations about all corners of life. Whether you find yourself in the middle of a Tumblr thread about why statistics is a necessary dumbness test, or maybe a riveting thread about how the world of plants is actually nuts, you can pretty much always count on having your brain tickled in one way or another. Anyways, enjoy these Tumblr gems and keep on Tumblin. 

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  • 01
    Rectangle - gayarsonist Follow woman in a victorian novel: *develops a fever from worrying too much* me, shivering and sweating with stress-induced anxiety: wtf that's so unrealistic lol 194,556 notes
    via r/tumblr
  • 02
    Font - greglestrade some customers: oh my god i'm so sorry i have to ask you a question i feel so foolish for not knowing this already please help me but i'm so sorry forgive me other customers: answer this question before i've even asked it or i'll kill you where you stand kai-ni #1 has worked in retail #2 hasn't 142,896 notes
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  • 03
    Font - goshdaggett So I went to the eye doctor, right, and I sit down to fill out the paperwork like you do and the lady was like "Thanks, Doctor Doctor will be with you in a moment" and I was like why did she say doctor twice that's weird but then I looked at the business cards on the table and his name was actually Dr. Chad Dockter and I looked around and the other assistant caught my eye and just nodded like "You just had the moment didn't you" mayasexual Chad saw his chance and took it
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  • 04
    Font - derinthescarletpescatarian Toddler accidentally cursed himself into an identity crisis today. derinthescarletpescatarian He's been crossing stuff out with chalk. He asked me to write his name for him, crossed it out, and had a panicked meltdown because he thought it meant he didn't exist any more. derinthescarletpescatarian Every hour or so he asks me "am I [his name?]" and wants reassuring hugs. headspace-hotel I'm enjoying the implication that he was perfectly delighted with arbitrarily
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  • 05
    Terrestrial plant - You ask me for the time and notice my watch is actually a live shrimp hugging my wrist, he whispers "12:30" but he's guesstimating as shrimps usually do "what time is it" you ask, i pull out my 2.7 metric ton granite sundial and immediately crush both of your feet, I loudly announce "it is cloudy"
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  • 06
    Font - buttalecki: when i was in primary school the head teacher stood up in assembly and said "who can tell me the hardest word to say" so i put my hand up and said "antidisestablishmentarianism" and the principal said "no the correct answer is the word sorry“ and it was in that moment that i lost my trust in the entire education system Source: buttalecki 377,117 notes ...
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  • 07
    Recipe - because-edmund My dad got very excited because he thinks my frog looks like this biscuit
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  • 08
    Hand - LOOK INTO THE VOID, THE GREAT AND TERRIELE THOUGHT OF NONEXISTENCE YOURSELF AND ASK IE YOU ARE WORTHY OF THE GIFTS BESTOWED UPON YOU I call them "existential pranks", and they're gonna be the next big thing teaboot I have been informed that this is psychological warfare
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  • 09
    Font - shipvicturi McDonald's has their 20 piece chicken nuggets on the 2 for $3 menu right now. You're supposed to mix and match items, but there's nothing stopping you from getting 2 orders of them for $3. Which means, for the low, low price of $9.63, I just got 120 chicken nuggets. The lady asked me three times if I was sure I wanted that many, and then when I rolled up to the window, she looked in my backseat like she expected to see four kids there, but it was just me. I took my 120 chicken
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  • 10
    Font - siskyisoutofbusiness: omfG SO TODAY IN PHYSICS THIS GIRL'S PHONE WENT OFF AND HER RINGTONE WAS SHINE BRIGHT LIKE A DIAMOND AND MY TEACHER STOOD UP AND SAID TURN THAT THING OFF IF I HEAR IT AGAIN I WILL PERSONALLY TRACK DOWN RIHANNA AND EXPLAIN TO HER THAT DIAMONDS DO NOT SHINE THEY REFLECT do you think this is the right time to tell my physics teacher he's tumblr famous noW
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  • 11
    Output device - dankmemeuniversity Friend: You can't possibly guess a wheel of fortune puzzle with no letters Мe: Coino 80's SONG LYRICS zuesue oh my GOD
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  • 12
    Terrestrial plant - vampireapologist Follow we drink boba tea to satisfy our ancient & innate urge to slurp up tadpoles from a puddle through a reed isaidyoulookshitty Follow no we absolutely do not glumshoe Follow yes we do
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  • 13
    Font - thebestestboyo greenninjagal-blog Follow apathetic-revenant Follow you know what I want? a post-apocalypse farm game. you're a wanderer who happens upon a farm. it's overgrown and decayed, looks like it's been abandoned for some time. but as you investigate you meet the old man who lives there. he's been living on this farm for years but as his health has decayed he's been increasingly unable to take care of it. he sees you are interested and asks if you would like to take it over. you, o
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  • 14
    Font - thebootydiaries 5 thebootydiaries •.. talksick Follow just heard my roommate yell 'you USED me!!!' from the living room n im sitting here like ??? 2 seconds later my rat comes running into my room holding a french fry in his lil baby mouth 509,253 notes
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  • 15
    Font - bilanzarev so i work at a retirement home and one of the residents heard me saying "mood" all the time and she asked what it meant and now she won't stop saying it another resident fell over and she was just like "mood" spacedijks op you are adding invasive elements to a fragile ecosystem, society is going to collapse because of this doujinshi mood Source: bilanzarev 81,582 notes >
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  • 16
    Font - juicedoesthings Follow Remember if you're out at a store and someone says "This is a robbery" you can say “no it's not" and then the robber will leave because theyre a robber and this is no longer a robbery . juicedoesthings Follow alonelybeemakingart reblogged your post "Remember if you're out at a store and someone..." Aa #This is obviously a joke but #a coworker of my father kinda did this #(unintentionally) #And it worked You can not just say this without dropping the whole story alon
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  • 17
    Font - jumpingjaverts whats the difference between outlaws and inlaws jumpingjaverts outlaws are wanted jumpingjaverts come on reblog this my grandma told me this joke and was convinced she was going to be famous on tumblr for it jumpingjaverts every time my mom and grandma get into an argument my grandma says "excuse me pamela i am famous on the tumbler" Source: jumpingjaverts 437,185 notes
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  • 18
    Font - A radieldancliffe the head bone's connected to the neck bone the neck bone's connected to the neck bone the neck bone's connected to the neck bone the neck bone's connected to the neck bone the neck bone's connected to the neck bone the neck bone's connected to the neck bone the neck bone's connected to the neck bone there are seven cervical vertebrae aspiringdoctors Why am I laughing so hard at this. Source: chong-jeongguk-balsa 247,998 notes
    via r/tumblr

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humor entertainment tumblr social media ridiculous funny tumblr
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